Baby Momma/Daddy Drama gets Old

Leslie Jones McCloud

Imagine this: you meet the perfect man but he has four children with another woman he had been seeing off and on for years. You have no kids. This other woman’s baby daddy proposes. Should you accept?

This scenario is played out in lives across the country. Either the guy is marrying a woman with several children and baby’s daddies or the guy him self has multiple children by multiple woman or one woman. Somehow these people who have kids in common don’t get married but instead feel they have the right to look for love elsewhere.

Imagine if the baby’s momma was angry after her baby daddy refused to marry her. Now  imagine her waiting until he asks her to marry him before sex and babies. Imagine more stable black homes.

Even with a great imagination, the reality is African American women are more likely to father children out-of-wedlock and with multiple men. Most of these women hope with each pregnancy, the father of her child or children will ask for her hand in marriage, otherwise why are you having his children, woman? (unfortunately there are women who just like being pregnant.)

Many men ask this question too. Real talk is that many of these men only want sex from the woman, not love, marriage or a bloodline of children. This is why they ignore them. They ignore the woman and they ignore the children he made with her. If a man does not love a woman, he won’t take care of her or their children. Complicate that with men who are willing to support their surprise family but can’t find jobs and have not planned to have a career and we get double-digit single-mother headed households.

How are we supposed to have healthy relationships with all of this going on?

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